The Paradox of Positivity
As you are doing your daily social media scroll, you come across a video of a plus-size woman proudly showing off her outfit for the day. She is clearly out of breath and sweating, even with just talking. “You’re beautiful the way you are.” “Don’t change anything about your body.” “Love the confidence!” There is barely any negativity found in the comments section, just pure acceptance. However, as you continue scrolling, you stumble upon another woman’s video, this time fit and tall with long, lean legs. Strangely, the comments accuse her of body-shaming and being unappreciative when she is simply seeking health advice. While rooted in good intentions, the constant emphasis on body positivity often leads to toxic positivity.
Body positivity is defined as “the assertion that all people deserve to have a positive body image, regardless of how society and popular culture view ideal shape, size, and appearance” (Kendra Cherry, MSEd, 2020). However, having a positive body image also includes addressing all the issues and challenges that may be associated with one’s body. Because of this, there are people who feel compelled to put on a mask of perpetual positivity, leaving no room to process what they actually feel. It minimizes their concerns, deeming them as unimportant and not worthy to be acknowledged. This then fosters an environment where vulnerability and discussions about these struggles are discouraged for the sake of acceptance. This approach ignores the reality that it is normal and acceptable for one to have fluctuations in self-esteem and body image.
Furthermore, the demand for constant positivity dismisses body image struggles, as it downplays the seriousness of these struggles and makes people more hesitant to seek help and support for these concerns. It sends a message that negative emotions are not valid since embracing everything is seen as a quick fix. Those struggling will continue to grow more hesitant in sharing and seeking help. This facade of satisfaction will continue to mask mental health challenges, such as body dysmorphia and eating disorders.
This perpetual positivity can also blind people from the urgency to address physical health challenges such as obesity and anorexia. They are given a false sense of contentment with the belief that their body is perfect the way it is when this mentality is unhealthy and could cause serious health issues in the future. The avoidance of this reality leads to significant delays in intervention and appropriate treatment. The danger lies in the possibility that individuals realize the seriousness of the situation only when it has reached a very critical stage. It may even be too late to prevent severe physical consequences or fatalities.
While the body positivity movement seeks self-love and acceptance, it is important to find balance and acknowledge that everyone’s journey with their body is unique. Dismissing negativity does not necessarily kindle positivity. It is through compassion and understanding that we welcome genuine emotions and encourage individuals to seek the right support. This approach can lead to a healthier and more authentic relationship with their bodies.
The cost of ignoring one’s physical needs exceeds that of self-acceptance. Just like one experiences ups and downs in various aspects of life, it is completely okay and natural to experience the same fluctuations in our body image. It’s important that we treat our own bodies with the love, care, and nurturing that we readily offer to others – our bodies deserve nothing less.
